So what was the difference? Why would one person be so upset about an overdraft fee while another would shrug off a whole slew of them?
Admittedly there have been far more examples of these situations in banking than in fast food. Although there was the time I dropped a glass of soda in a guy's lap - that was way embarrassing and maybe even more so for him than for me, I'm really not sure! But I have concluded people get far more emotional about their money than their food.
But still the question remained: Why did the same situation seemingly have such a different impact on some people than others?
I finally concluded it all has to do with one criteria, that is, whether or not a given scenario matches the person's expectations.
Think about it. Whenever someone is upset about something, it's because reality is differing from what he or she had expected to happen. I can't really think of a scenario where this is not the case. The overdraft fees? Some people know about the fees and understand what happens when they don't pay attention to their account balances, and thus the fees don't cause a surprise or undo angst. Others are so taken aback, they have difficulty coping without erupting in an undesirable manner.
Last summer prior to taking a new position at the bank where I currently work, I was nervous about the very real possibility that I might not be able to deal with the additional stress that was certain to follow if I took this job. I had gone through a great deal of stress when I worked at Wells Fargo and was loving the current lack of pressure. The only problem was I noticed that my tolerance for stress was way low; even very small problems tended to give me anxiety that could be quite challenging to work through.
I was excited at the prospect of new responsibilities and growth opportunities. But how would I cope with a compliance exam from the federal regulators for example, when I was having difficulty with... traffic?? I needed to work through this dilemma and found myself discussing the situation with my accupuncturist.
Greg immediately referred me to a book he had read that he thought might help and wrote down the title and author for me: "Loving What Is" by Byron Katie. I ordered it from Amazon.com that evening. This book is all about realizing it is possible to feel at peace... no matter what the scenario. It TOTALLY felt like my prior perspectives were stood on their head as I worked my way through the examples. It has been so helpful to me! It puts great meaning behind the common saying, "It is what it is," while helping one really feel okay about it rather than feeling resigned which is short for feeling depressed. :)
I've been in this job for almost a year, and have managed very well. I'm so glad I had the courage to try. And I remind myself that the only reason upset feeling occur is because I was expecting something else and the reality is probably okay. It's turning out to be a pretty good philosophy...
